Confession time: by nature I’m a little shy (and a lot introverted), so when I finally resolved to stop doubting and start dating, I naturally turned to a place where I’ve always felt comfortable: the book store.
And if the preponderance of dating books for guys is any indication, I’m not the only one who has had that instinct.
Book stores like Amazon and Barnes and Noble are flooded with dating books for men who want to master every aspect of romance, from how to send an effective text to how to have a successful marriage.
As with so many other aspects of life, reading informative, insightful and well written books about dating and relationships made me much more confident in my romantic prowess, which in turn made me a better date, partner and – dare I say it – man.
But not all dating books for guys are created equal. While some offer well founded research and insightful anecdotes, a lot of them unfortunately peddle unfounded nonsense and, in some cases, misogynistic bullshit.
I can’t claim to have read every dating book under the sun, but I can (and do!) claim to have gotten pretty good at sniffing out the good books from the bad. So to help save you from having to sift through hundreds of shitty titles yourself, I’ve scoured Amazon to find the mostly highly rated and best dating books for guys, according to thousands of crowd-sourced reviews.
Scroll down to discover 14 dating books for men who want to build both competence and confidence in the realm of romance.
The Best Dating Books for Men
These Are the Best Dating Books for Guys Who Genuinely Want to Improve
The Man’s Guide to Women
Scientifically Proven Secrets from the Love Lab About What Women Really Want
4.5 Stars on Amazon
Results from world-renowned relationship expert John Gottman’s famous Love Lab have proven an incredible truth: Men make or break relationships. Based on 40 years of research, The Man’s Guide to Women unlocks the mystery of how to attract, satisfy, and…
The Game
Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists
4 Stars on Amazon
Hidden somewhere, in nearly every major city in the world, is an underground seduction lair. And in these lairs, men trade the most devastatingly effective techniques ever invented to charm women. This is not fiction. These men really exist. And Neil Strauss, the bestselling author and journalist, spent two years living among them…
The Truth
Sex, Love, Commitment, and the Puzzle of the Male Mind
4.5 Stars on Amazon
In The Truth, Neil Strauss takes on his greatest challenge yet: Relationships. And in this wild and highly entertaining ride, he explores the questions that men and women are asking themselves every day: Is it natural to be faithful to one person for life?
Do alternatives to monogamy lead to better relationships…?
Stop Doubting, Start Dating
A Shy Guy’s Guide To Building Confidence, Meeting Women, and (Finally!) Getting the Girl
(Shameless plug alert!!)
Full disclosure: as the author of this particular book, I am extremely biased. But I wouldn’t have written it if I didn’t think it could help. (And my wife frequently tells me—and anyone else who will listen—that I’m absolutely a subject matter expert.)
I wrote Stop Doubting, Start Dating to help other shy, introverted and introspective guys like me push past their fears, build social and romantic confidence, and learn how to not just put themselves out there, but attract women to them.
As you can imagine, I highly recommend it. (As does my wife.)
What Women Want In A Man
How to Become the Alpha Male Women Respect, Desire, and Want to Submit To
4.5 Stars on Amazon
In order to attract and more importantly, KEEP a good woman in your life you must become the kind of man that she simply cannot live without. This is your only job as a man when it comes to dating and…
The Art of Seduction
An Indispensible Primer on the Ultimate Form of Power
4.5 Stars on Amazon
In The Art of Seduction, Robert Greene returns with a new instruction on the most subtle, elusive, and effective form of power, because seduction isn’t really about sex. It’s about manipulating other people’s greatest weakness: their desire for…
Conversation Casanova
How to Effortlessly Start Conversations and Flirt Like a Pro
4.5 Stars on Amazon
What if you could effortlessly strike up a conversation with any women, at any time, in any environment? What if you knew exactly how to keep the conversation going (so you never ran out of things to say)? What if you could command women’s attention and instantly…
The Dating Playbook For Men
A Proven 7 Step System To Go From Single To The Woman Of Your Dreams
4.5 Stars on Amazon
Unlike the other “dating advice” books on the market, the Dating Playbook For Men isn’t packed with fluff and filler content that leaves you even more confused before you picked up the book.No games. No rah rah motivation. No weird seduction tactics. It’s just raw, actionable content designed to…
How to Text a Girl
4.5 Stars on Amazon
This easy-to-use, step-by-step guide shows you how to text a girl, what to text, and when to text it to her. If you’re tired of “spin your wheels” texting advice, buy this book. Its approach draws from 18 cutting edge scientific studies on texting…
Mate
Become the Man Women Want
4.5 Stars on Amazon
Whether they conducted their research in life or in the lab, experts Tucker Max and Dr. Geoffrey Miller have spent the last 20+ years learning what women really want from their men, why they want it, and how men can deliver those qualities.
Single, Dating, Engaged, Married
Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age
5 Stars on Amazon
Though many young people can avoid early pregnancy and STDs, most cannot dodge the depression and feelings of isolation that characterize this modern generation. Studies show a dramatic rise in self-reported loneliness among the young. How can a young man navigate such troubled waters?
Models
Attract Women Through Honesty
4.5 Stars on Amazon
Models is the first men’s dating book ever written on seduction as a purely emotional process rather than a logical one, a process of connecting with women rather than impressing them, a process of self-expression rather than…
How To Be A 3% Man
Winning The Heart Of The Woman Of Your Dreams
4.5 Stars on Amazon
This book teaches you the hidden secrets to completely understand women. How you can meet and date the type of women you’ve always wanted and have effortless relationships! How to get women to pursue you and…
Deeper Dating
How to Drop the Games of Seduction and Discover the Power of Intimacy
4.5 Stars on Amazon
In Deeper Dating, psychotherapist Ken Page offers a new path to finding meaningful and lasting relationships. Learn how to attract people who love you for who you really are, become more self-assured and emotionally available, and lose your taste for…
Wired for Dating
How Understanding Neurobiology and Attachment Style Can Help You Find Your Ideal Mate
4 Stars on Amazon
In the age of online dating, finding a real connection can seem more daunting than ever! So, why not stack the odds of finding the right person in your favor? This book offers simple, proven-effective principles drawn from neuroscience and attachment theory to…
Bonus!
The Best Dating Courses for Guys
As I mentioned above, when I finally decided to seek some dating help, I turned to books because a) I’m a nerd and b) that’s what I was used to doing.
But that was years ago, and since then a new medium has popped up that’s proven itself to be at least as effective – and in some cases, maybe more effective – at teaching new skills:
Online courses.
Most online dating courses combine both text lessons, like you’d get in books, with video lessons, which you obviously can’t.
That’s great because seeing and hearing a real person explain and even execute the advice being offered helps you bridge the gap between theory and practice, and bring the advice into the real world.
There’s no shortage of dating “gurus” out there offering online courses, but they can be expensive, and it’s often hard to tell how valuable they are before you buy. That’s why I like Udemy, which is basically the Amazon of online courses.
Like Amazon, it uses crowd-sourced user reviews to rate each of the courses it offers, allowing you to get a better sense of whether or not each course delivers on its promise.
Here are the five highest-rated courses on Udemy that offer dating advice for guys:
WANTED! – Dating for Men simplified
4.9 Stars on Udemy
“Tired of Loneliness? – Uncover the simple 10-step system I used to boost my self-confidence and meet my Dream Woman”
Dating: How to Really Find Perfect Date and Lover in 2020
4.8 Stars on Udemy
“How to program your mind to seek out a compatible date and lover by tuning your mind correctly for dating the right one.”
The Ultimate Guide to Love, Dating & Relationships
4.4 Stars on Udemy
“Discover the secrets, principles and strategies that allow people to build healthy, happy and rewarding relationships.”
Dating and Relationship Masterclass
4.6 Stars on Udemy
“Become the Irresistible Man Every Woman Desires”
How to Attract Amazing Women and Form Intimate Relationships
4.6 Stars on Udemy
“Learn how to navigate the world of women and dating with confidence and integrity.”
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Further Reading ↓
Dating Advice From Irreverent Gent:
- 9 Fundamental First Date Tips for Guys
- 5 Proven Ways to Take Awesome Profile Pics
- eharmony vs. Match – How to Choose the One That’s Right for You
Dating Book Recos from Around the Web:
- Lifestyle-Arts – 10 Must-Read Dating Books for Men
- Vocal Media – Best Dating Books for Guys
- The Power Moves – 10 Best Dating Books for Guys
As the founder of Irreverent Gent, Dave shares smart style advice that helps guys look sharp, and smart-ass jokes that make them wish he’d just stick to advice. When not blogging, he loves working out, obsessing over the MCU (#ILoveYou3000) and pretending to know about wine when his wife takes him somewhere fancy.
