Being addicted to online porn is a time-consuming and frustrating state that damages everything from our self-esteem and productivity to our sexual health and relationships with other people.
Even worse, grappling with a pornography addiction can be incredibly lonely and isolating, because we often feel too embarrassed to admit our problem to other people.
And since we don’t want anyone to know about our addiction, many people fail to seek out advice or get the help they need to overcome it.
Fortunately, there’s a way to gain the insight and knowledge you need to kick your porn habit, without having to reveal any embarrassing details to other people.
In this post I’ve rounded up more than a dozen insightful, instructional and (just as importantly) compassionate books about porn addiction that can help you overcome your addiction and break the bad habits that are holding you back.
The Best Books on Porn Addiction
Breaking Down the Best Books for (Finally!) Breaking The Habit
Overall Best Book on Porn Addiction ↓
Treating Pornography Addiction: The Essential Tools for Recovery
By Dr. Kevin B. Skinner
From Amazon:
- 4.5 Stars
- 209 Reviews
This book carefully walks someone struggling with porngraphy through the steps to recovery. Dr. Skinner discusses how pornography becomes a problem in the mind and how it becomes addictive.
Then he teaches the reader how to rewrite the patterns in the mind. It closes with the key steps of recovery.
Included in the book is a brief assessment tool “Assessing Pornography Addiction.”
Our Take:
Dr. Kevin Skinner’s Treating Pornography Addiction tops our list of books because it does an excellent job balancing the why and the how:
First it explains why pornography use leads to such unwanted and compulsive behavior. This understanding helps porn addicts escape the shame they often feel by providing context for their addiction.
Once that understanding is in place, Skinner moves on to a step by step plan, providing practical steps that will help you break unhealthy habits and escape the negative consequences that result from the excessive use of porn.
If you’ve been struggling to escape the seemingly endless stream of porn videos and finally get control of your pornography problems, this is a great resource.
The Porn Trap: The Essential Guide to Overcoming Problems Caused by Pornography
By Wendy Maltz and Larry Maltz
From Amazon:
- 4.3 Stars
- 392 Reviews
In this highly acclaimed recovery guide, renowned sex and relationship therapists Wendy and Larry Maltz shed new light on the compelling nature and destructive power of today’s instantly available pornography.
Weaving together poignant real-life stories with innovative exercises, checklists, and expert advice, this groundbreaking resource provides a comprehensive program for understanding and healing porn addiction and other serious consequences of porn use.
Our Take:
Unfortunately, porn has become arguably the most potent and easily available drug of the new millennium, leaving huge numbers of people struggling to cope with addiction.
This is a great book for remembering that in this age of addiction, if you’re one of the many people trying to break free from your porn habit, you’re not alone.
In addition to helping you break free from the nightmare cycle of addiction, this book is helpful because it shares the true stories of men who have struggled with the same addictive behavior, and emerged triumphant on the other side.
Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Love, and Porn Addiction
By Robert Weiss
From Amazon:
- 4.5 Stars
- 286 Reviews
Sex Addiction 101 covers everything from what sexual addiction is and how it can best be treated, to how it affects various subgroups of the population such as women, gays, and teenagers.
The book also provides sex addicts with strategies to protect themselves from the online sexual onslaught.
Sex Addiction 101 is intended to enlighten the clinical population as well as actual sex addicts and their loved ones.
Our Take:
Written by a recovering addict, this book serves as a complete guide to quitting porn.
Even among people who are actively addicted, there’s little understanding of the (many) ways that pornography hijacks your brain and reaks havoc on your sexual habits.
Robert Weiss explores these mechanisms in depth, explains how pornography negatively affects people of every age, gender and sexual orientation, and shows you how to overcome your addiction.
Breaking the Cycle
By George Collins and Andrew Adleman
From Amazon:
- 4.5 Stars
- 382 Reviews
Anyone who has struggled with sex addiction knows that living with constant sexual compulsions can be extremely difficult.
But summoning the courage to find help for this condition can be even more of a challenge.
If addictions to pornography, strip clubs, massage parlors, prostitutes, phone sex, or chat rooms have made you feel trapped, this book can help you find a way to break free.
Our Take:
This book provides both great advice and great encouragement for young men struggling with addictions to porn and sex, and the devastatingly negative emotions that often come with them.
It’s full of well-founded, compassionate advice that will help you begin your healing journey and set you on a path towards more more fulfilling sexual activity.
Your Brain on Porn
By Gary Wilson
From Amazon:
- 4.7 Stars
- 1,718 Reviews
In Your Brain on Porn Wilson provides a concise introduction to the phenomenon of internet porn addiction that draws on both first-person accounts and the findings of cognitive neuroscience.
In a voice that is generous and humane, he also offers advice for those who want to stop using internet pornography. The publication of Your Brain on Porn is a landmark in our attempts to understand, and remain balanced in, a world where addiction is big business.
Our Take:
As Wilson points out, the invention of high speed internet and mobile devices changed the world in many ways, and not all of them for the better.
Thanks to such easy access, today many millions of people all over the world use porn as a new drug – and as with other drugs, it often prevents them from having happy, healthy relationships.
Wilson’s book explores these consequences, covering everything from the history of erectile dysfunction to the intricacies of the male brain, and provides an excellent resource for those who want to understand their porn use, and defeat it once and for all.
Breaking Addiction: A 7-Step Handbook for Ending Any Addiction
By Lance M. Dodes MD
From Amazon:
- 4.4 Stars
- 197 Reviews
The follow-up to his groundbreaking volume The Heart of Addiction, Dr. Lance Dodes’s Breaking Addiction is a step-by-step guide to beating addiction of any kind—from drugs and gambling to alcoholism, overeating, and sex addiction.
By recognizing and understanding the emotional forces underlying addictive behaviors, Dr. Dodes says any dangerous, life-destroying obsession can be overcome.
Our Take:
While porn, sex and love addiction may have their own unique triggers, the truth is that all forms of addictive behavior have underlying similar patterns.
Dr. Dodes’ handbook explains these patterns, and provides an overview of the emerging science of addiction, along with a seven-step plan for embarking on the path toward sex addiction recovery.
Wack: Addicted to Internet Porn
By Noah B.E. Church
From Amazon:
- 4.6 Stars
- 58 Reviews
This book is a scientific exploration of how Internet porn affects us, an examination of how it has influenced our culture, and a guide for those who would like to quit the porn habit and heal themselves of porn-induced symptoms.
This is the story of people who have acted to retake control of their lives and restore themselves to full sexual and emotional function. This is my story. This may be your story.
Our Take:
In addition to summarizing the science, Wack shares personal stories from a wide range of individuals – from lonely singles to men in a (seemingly) stable, committed relationship – to demonstrate how porn addiction can afflict any and every type of man.
It’s both a practical, personal and hopeful book that reminds you that many real people have walked this path before, and shows you how to walk in their footsteps.
Facing the Shadow
By Dr. Patrick Carnes
From Amazon:
- 4.6 Stars
- 552 Reviews
For all addicts, a moment comes when they realize they have a problem. There is sudden clarity—the insight that life has become unmanageable.
That moment, however, is fragile. It is easily lost to craving and denial. People struggling with sex addiction find the old refrains creeping back into their thinking:
“My situation is different. . . . This will all blow over. . . . People are over-reacting to my behavior.” Or, “This is hopeless. I’m just too perverted to change.”
Facing the Shadow, used by thousands of therapists with their clients, is based on the thirty-task model of recovery from addiction that forms the basis of Carnes’s work.
This newly revised and expanded edition takes readers through the first seven of those tasks, including specific performables that are built into the exercises.
Our Take:
Patrick Carnes is credited with popularizing the term “sex addiction” and is consdiered by many to be the godfather of healing.
Facing the Shadow is Carnes’ introduction to the 30-step process he proposes for breaking addiction, and provides both expert insight and actionable assignments that will help you move toward recovery and healing.
Life After Lust: Stories and Strategies for Sex & Pornography Addiction Recovery
By Forest Benedict & Shane Adamson
From Amazon:
- 4.3 Stars
- 110 Reviews
Recovery from sexual addiction is difficult, possible, and worth the effort. Forest knows. He’s been there.
Once shackled by shame and secrecy, sex addiction therapist Forest Benedict writes candidly about his personal recovery journey, sharing many science-based strategies for successful recovery.
Life After Lust provides a clear recovery roadmap for men and women ready to embark on the heroic path from pain to purpose. All who seek a renewed vision for recovery will find help and hope within the pages of this book.
Our Take:
Another book written by a recovering addict, Life After Lust mixes personal stories with prescriptions for improvement.
This is a great reminder that you’re not alone in trying to break free from porn’s grasp, and if you’ve failed to overcome your addiction in the past, it’s time to try a different way.
Addict America: The Lost Connection
By Dr. Carol Clark
From Amazon:
- 4.6 Stars
- 55 Reviews
Based on the innovative premise that addiction is not limited to drugs or alcohol, but is truly about the over-the-top, out-of-control lifestyles that have detached Americans from each other and their spiritual Connections (with a capital “C”).
Dr. Carol Clark looks at addiction as something in and of itself, a condition rather than a substance abuse or behavioral problem.
She then offers practical strategies for change that will ground and Connect the readers so they may find happiness and fulfillment in their daily lives.
Our Take:
Carol Clark is a sex therapist who brings insight, expertise and compassionate to the task of helping people escape porn addiction.
In Addict America, she lays out a whole-person approach that will not only change your mindset, but help heal your wounded heart.
It’s Not About the Sex: Moving from Isolation to Intimacy After Sexual Addiction
By Andrew Susskind
From Amazon:
- 4.4 Stars
- 40 Reviews
Drawing on personal and professional experience, psychotherapist Andrew Susskind examines issues such as shame, grief, narcissism, and codependency to demonstrate how people use out-of-control sexual behavior to cope with brokenheartedness and trauma.
He offers strategies to cultivate sustainable sexual sobriety, sharing his own healing narrative, as well as those of others who’ve chosen to bare their truths.
No one is ever too hurt or isolated to achieve reliable relationships and emotional intimacy. This is a guidebook for every person seeking long-term healing from sex addiction.
Our Take:
For a lot of porn addicts, the problem isn’t just how much time they spend watching it – it’s how terrible they feel about themselves afterwards.
Susskind addresses these issues head-on and provides actionable advice for moving to a healthier, happier place.
The Porn Myth: Exposing The Reality Behind the Fantasy of Pornography
By Matt Fradd
From Amazon:
- 4.7 Stars
- 256 Reviews
Matt Fradd provides insightful arguments, including the latest scientific research, on nearly every relevant subject imaginable, exposing the negative impact pornography has on our minds, our relationships, and our culture.
This book addresses the neurological reasons porn is addictive, helps individuals learn how to be free of porn, and offers real help to parents and the spouses of porn users.
The Porn Myth will help readers to separate the myths from the reality about porn, and to reclaim real love in their lives. Matt Fradd masterfully articulates and dispels the falsehoods that have helped to spread porn addiction and sexual dysfunction, and he inspires us to take action against them.
Our Take:
Viewing pleasurable sexual online content releases dopamine in your brain, which you then crave more of.
Matt Fradd’s book dives deep into this fact and the many other strategies pornography uses to grab hold of your attention, helping to weaken its hold in the process.
Ethical Porn for Dicks: A Man’s Guide to Responsible Viewing Pleasure
By David Ley
From Amazon:
- 4.4 Stars
- 70 Reviews
Our media are filled with cautionary, polarizing messages about the dangers of porn, even while sexually explicit images are exploited deliberately and persuasively in ads and entertainment.
With a casual style and topical format, this accessible, funny, and evidence-based book offers anyone feeling shame and anxiety about their own or their partner’s behavior a nonjudgmental way to view and use pornography responsibly.
Our Take:
This book is for those who don’t want to give up porn completely, but understand that it’s not always a benign harmless thing.
David Ley offers strategies that will help you enjoy it responsibly, without devolving into the addictive and self-destructive behavior that can all-too-often emerge.
Battling A Sex Addiction: How The Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction
By Carlos Triblett
From Walmart:
This book provides a new and proven treatment method that will empower you to take control and finally manage your addiction.
The key is understanding the road to recovery from a sex/porn addiction goes through your childhood. Why? Because it’s your inner child who is running the show.
Endorsed by many leaders in the sex/porn addiction field, the book is a game changer and can be the solution you have been seeking when it comes to breaking free from your sex and porn addictions.
Our Take:
Triblett’s assertion that your addiction stems from your childhood is fairly unique within the field, and may not be for everyone.
But for those whose issues really do date back to their youth, it’s an important and seminal book for understanding your addiction and beginning recovery.
In the Shadows of the Net
By Patrick J. Carnes, David L. Delmonico and Elizabeth Griffin
From Amazon:
- 4.4 Stars
- 199 Reviews
Compulsive online sexual behavior is a real and growing problem. Yet the situation is not without hope.
For those who are seeing signs of significant online problems in themselves or a loved one, this updated second edition of In the Shadows of the Net provides answers, understanding, and tools for recovery.
With the latest statistics, discussion of recent technologies and devices, and new thinking on developing a healthy relationship with the Internet and avoiding relapse, this book offers authoritative, professional advice for achieving lasting, healthy change and healing.
Our Take:
Another book co-authored by Carnes, here he teams with marriage and family therapist Elizabeth Griffin and psychology professor David Demonico.
Together the three experts explore the specific role the internet plays in perpetuating porn and sex addiction, and share advice on how to counter its most insidious effects.
Being addicted to online porn is a time-consuming and frustrating state that damages everything from our self-esteem and productivity to our sexual health and relationships with other people.
Even worse, grappling with a pornography addiction can be incredibly lonely and isolating, because we often feel too embarrassed to admit our problem to other people.
And since we don’t want anyone to know about our addiction, many people fail to seek out advice or get the help they need to overcome it.
Fortunately, there’s a way to gain the insight and knowledge you need to kick your porn habit, without having to reveal any embarrassing details to other people.
Summary
Summary
Dr. Kevin Skinner’s Treating Pornography Addiction tops our list of books because it does an excellent job balancing the why and the how of porn addiction. If you’ve been struggling to escape the seemingly endless stream of porn videos and finally get control of your pornography problems, this is a great resource.
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Banner Image: Aaron Owens / Unsplash
Patrick MacEwan
Pat McCullough is a recovering porn addict who now writes about pornography addiction and sexual health in an effort to help other guys escape the trap and build a new, more powerful sense of self-esteem and confidence.